The Packing/Paketimi

The Packing/Paketimi

What a controversy it is...
Seeing here portrayed by the stuff I own, the person who I was until now and the person who I am going to be. Together in one suitcase, I am putting the short silk dress I wore exhaustively this past summer and Tolstoy’s’ "Anna Karenina", which I always had with me the days I wore this dress to the park. More than for my own possessions, I had to make room for my new designer evening gowns, my perfectly shining liras and my embroidered mindila. The latter, various gifts from the "future", which, like it or not, I will have to wear.

Will it be possible for me to merge these two identities as effortlessly
in myself as I did in this suitcase? 
Or will accepting the one mean losing the other?

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Shqetesimet/The Worrying

Shqetesimet/The Worrying

Një gjë e caktuar se nëna ime do thoshte, ka qëndruar gjithmonë me mua. 
Kur une isha nje vajze e re, shpesh e dëgjoja nenen time duke derdellis me grate e tjera:
Per vajzat më vjen keq gjithmone. Nuk ju dihet kismeti. 

Besoj qe nuk e kam kuptuar me te vertete peshen e këtyre fjaleve deri ne naten e fundit. Duke i renditur njezet e dy vjet te gjerave te mia, fillova të humbni kontrollin e emocioneve të mia qe unë kisha shtypur aq forte se bashku me këto kuti: plehraper te dhuruarper te sjelle me vete. E kapa veten duke qesh nën hundë me paradoxin e skenës. Si e rregullt çdo gjë u shfaq para meje, por pasiguria e së ardhmes peshonte rëndë në gjoksin tim.

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